A mother's guilt

Life's full of catch 22 situations when you're a mum. Damned if you do, damned if you don't. I really think midwives should issue a t-shirt to every new mum on the arrival of her first born.

The boy has started day care recently and while I was hesitant to let him out from under my wing, I am on the other hand delighted to do so for various reasons. However, the floodgates I was so anxiously expecting did open and I am not looking forward to a prolonged battle of teary morning drop offs.

He's the kind of boy who's happy to be where he is once he gets there, and once he's comfortable, he's all in and all go, but the reserved, shy side to him isn't quite as brave as he would like to be and his emotions overwhelm him - not surprisingly since I'm such a cool mummy to hang out with hehehe.

And so Monday's and Tuesday's are met with anticipation and apprehension from the both of us. I love the fact he's learning new things and that he has the opportunity to be independent of his mummy, but there's this horrible knot each morning as I leave him there with waterworks in full flight.

I could google the word guilt, however the Concise Oxford definition would no doubt differ from the actual one a mother would pen if it were she who wrote the dictionary.

I am trying to decide if this little challenge is more for him or for me, and I'm concluding that it is for us both, and I think we'll both be enriched and enlightened once we are over the initial shock of not being so joined at the hip.